Character Assassination: The Dangers of Storytelling

A dear friend once said, “There are only two types of people in this world: those who seek to unite and those who seek to divide.”

As a professional certified coach with nearly two decades of experience, I’ve guided countless clients through the tumultuous waters of workplace politics and personal growth. Despite my dedication to fostering open and honest communication, I found myself on the receiving end of a distorted narrative that spiraled out of control, creating division, damaging trust and ended in a character assignation. Mine. 

For anyone reading this, I hope this serves as a powerful reminder to pause before passing judgment, to seek clarity before accepting or spreading a narrative, and to remember that even the most seemingly innocent comments can be twisted into something harmful. Words have immense power—they shape perceptions, influence decisions, and can alter the course of someone’s personal and professional life.

When a story is told with malicious intent, it’s often designed to do more than just share information. It’s meant to manipulate emotions and perceptions, casting doubt on someone’s character or motives. Such stories often start small, with a minor criticism or observation, but as they are repeated, they can grow, becoming more embellished and harmful with each retelling. The danger is that these narratives can take on a life of their own, spreading rapidly and embedding themselves in people’s minds as truth, even if they are based on half-truths, misinterpretations, or outright lies.

It’s crucial to be cautious when hearing or repeating a story that paints someone in a negative light. Consider the storyteller’s motivations—are they sharing this information to genuinely address a concern, or are they driven by personal grievances, envy, or the desire to shift blame? Ask yourself whether the story is being presented in a balanced manner, or if it is skewed to make the subject appear more culpable or unsympathetic than they truly are.

By pausing to question and seek clarity, we can prevent ourselves from being complicit in spreading harmful narratives. We protect not only the integrity of those being spoken about but also our own credibility and the overall integrity of our community or workplace. Choosing to build rather than destroy with our words means taking the time to listen, understand, and, if necessary, correct misinformation rather than blindly accepting and perpetuating it.

In a world where communication is instant and stories can spread like wildfire, it’s more crucial than ever to be mindful of the impact our words and actions have. Let’s use the power of storytelling to uplift and support, to foster understanding and growth, rather than to tear down and divide. After all, we are all the authors of the narratives that shape our environments—let’s choose to write stories that contribute to a positive, respectful, and truthful dialogue.